As much as this sounds like a possible UFC match title, it's not actually. This is something that quite a few, but not all we will emphasis, authors have faced. It's a battle that rarely has a "winner", more often than not it's two losers pouting in their respective corners.
These fights tend to be public, usually on a social media site. The reason these happen you ask, because when you are typing or texting there is no emotion to your words. What you thought to be cute and amusing when you typed it, the other person could well see as an insult or slight against them. Unless this person knows you very well, as in they've met you in person often, you've done things together and they know you, they could very well misinterpret your message. It can also come across wrong depending on their mood when they read it. If they were having a bad day and read what you wrote, it could just rub them the wrong way.
There is only one stance to take in a situation like this. And it doesn't matter if you are the author that got the message that rubbed you wrong or wrote a comment to another author that rubbed them the wrong way - walk away.That's right, and because it's so important, we'll repeat it in all caps. WALK AWAY! Don't reply until you can either see it for what it was meant to be or until you private message the person to ask them what the hell. Whatever you do, DO NOT REPLY ON THE PUBLIC FORUM with your first instinctual response.
Why? It's actually very simple. Everyone -your audience of readers, your publisher and every person you've ever friended- can potentially see this interaction. If they see you getting into a pissing match with another author this doesn't reflect good on you. It doesn't look good for the other author but they can play the wounded party in this interaction and gain sympathy.
Don't think it can't happen, it can. We've seen it happen on more than one occasion. Especially if it's between you and, a term we've often coined, the Golden Ones of your publishing house. These Golden Ones are up on a pedestal because they have their noses so far up your publishers ass that you can't tell one from the other. Brown nosing if you haven't clued into our drift here.
When you say anything that this Golden One deems uncalled for, below the belt or any other number of clichéd sayings, you are at fault. Even though you know you're not, you are in the eyes of the publisher. Because this Golden One has run off to tattle and gain sympathy behind the scenes before you can even contemplate defending yourself. Which, by this point, is now useless. Anything you say from this point forward is now just another nail in your coffin.
Yes, there are actually publishers out there with the moral code of a nest of vipers. And you will never be able to prove a damn thing - another fact you should know before engaging the enemy. Best to not let them get to you, best to just brush off their comments for the idiotic drivel it is and just walk away.
This is hard, we know it is, but it's the best advice we can offer. If you engage with another author in a verbal battle you won't be coming out all shiny and pristine. While it's hard to resist tossing back a comment to an author with the mentality of a spoiled three year old in the midst of a temper tantrum, it really is best to turn the other cheek.
Now, there is another side to all this. If they are attacking you in a manner that basically boils down to bullying or threats, report them to the site you are on and also to your publisher. But ensure you have a screen shot of the offending material to prove your case on the off chance they decide to delete the post because they just clued into what they've done. This screen shot will allow you to prove not only to your publisher and the site the acts of this person, but if it comes down to it, you can file it with your lawyer should further action be required down the road.
The Moderator
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